Thursday, September 29, 2011

CNF-Unwelcome Welcome Mats

Hey you! Yeah, I'm talking to you! We need to have a little chat. I know you think you could walk all over me, but you're wrong. I am not an object to trample on; I am a welcome mat! You walk to your doorway, and pound your nasty shoes all over my face. Or, better yet, you scrape whatever you carelessly stepped in all over me. It's filthy and wrong! When people walk to your door, I'm the first thing they see. I want to look like a welcome mat, not like something you salvaged from the dump yard! Next time you walk to your door, look at me and consider my feelings. I know you wouldn't like it if someone rudely walked on your face everyday. I demand you treat me with respect! Otherwise, me and the other welcome mats are going to teach you a lesson on respect! Do you understand what I'm saying? Oh, by the way, have a great day; I'll be here to welcome you when you come home!
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4 comments:

  1. Abby MarieSeptember 30, 2011 at 5:31 PM

    Good job! The sass works well in the piece. A "cool" comment would be to get rid of the last line. It doesn't really fit, maybe end with some kind of sassy goodbye statement.

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  2. AlysonOctober 1, 2011 at 11:55 AM

    The last line was so great, very strong but to make this stronger you could maybe show some of the actions more than just telling like the scrap whatever you stepped in all over me like be specific. But overall really good piece (:

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  3. ColletteOctober 2, 2011 at 4:42 PM

    I liked the "sassy" tone you conveyed in your piece. I also thought that the personification of a doormat was a clever idea!
    I noticed a couple lines that didn't fit with the brazenness of the rest of your monologue. "Next time you walk to your door, look at me and consider my feelings. I know you wouldn't like it if someone rudely walked on your face everyday" doesn't imply the attitude you were going for.
    Other than that, this is a job well done. :)

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  4. DeweyOctober 7, 2011 at 2:22 PM

    Haha love the last line! You used great personification in this piece. "I want to look like a welcome mat, not like something you salvaged from the dump yard!" Maybe to to use another object than welcome mat in this sentence. We already know what it is....keep it sassy with something like "a red carpet". :]

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